Have you ever wanted to be something but your pretty sure it won't happen. I spent many hours in the van tonight so I had a lot of time to think( I am past sitting in the arena I have been either in or sitting outside an arena since August) I would love to be a writer, maybe write a novel I can picture it all. The only problem to that dream is I have nothing, absolutely nothing, to write about I couldn't even come up with a clever idea little own make enough words for a novel. That was my heavy thinking for this evening.
I also just received an e-mail to the dry grad meeting which I did not go to. That night I had to take kids to hockey and my little ones to track and field plus my youngest daughter had hurt her foot and could not walk all night. However the feeling of guilt is still there... plus the only meeting I went to was where no one got along and all it was full of very over powering personalities yet I am very, very grateful to these people who took charge and make this grad work.
Well I must go my youngest daughter is sick so I must decide with what to do with her so I can go to bed. Any day lambing and kidding can start which means no sleep last year after no sleep for 24 hours I was in the arena until 11:15 pm I was so tired I fell asleep for a few minutes. When one gets that tired you actually feel sick and chilled and when I can't get sleep and I am sitting outside at night it always reminds me of camping and how I hate it. I like to be camping during the day but I hate the nights I really hate being way from home. I know go figure. Good night have a good sleep.